Recently, I was able to watch a Korean drama or Korean RomCom
series entitled as "my introverted boss" or "my shy boss".
I find it interesting that a show would feature the character of an introvert
person, an extreme one I should say. Thing is, I can somehow relate to the
character say 70% being an introvert too. Made me wonder, are there really
introverts like the character in this show? I do believe there are levels of
being an introvert or perhaps the existence of someone who is both introvert
and extrovert, as some would say. But I am unsure if such kind of super extreme
introvert exists. As for me? I would categorize myself as an extreme introvert
added with the character of being a Christian. In short, a Christian extreme
introvert.
Now, why I included the name or word Christian? I find it
somewhat having an effect to my character or personality. But let me point you
first on being an extreme introvert. As I have said, from the korean drama
"my introverted boss", I relate much with the character, but find it
too much over acting on some parts. Like running away from people or absolutely
not relating with other people. I think those are over acted or too much overboard,
unless there are real introverts like those. I don't know. But I hardly see
one. What I see in myself though, is that I'm not fond on looking at people,
except for secret peaks (hehe!). But most often, walking around I dare not look
on people much specially when I feel they are looking at me, unless when I notice a familiar shadow or face. More than
looking at people, I'm more attentive at people's actions unless I have a bad
night or what we call "puyat". My defensive mechanisms seem to be
lowered down, that is because I tend to suspect everywhere.
Stage freight, indeed that's one of the things I notice
on myself. But for a reason, there are times I am not. Most often, these
happens when I'm dealing with Christian matters (e.g. song leading, teaching / preaching)
and when I ask for God's enablement. This is the reason why I added the word
"Christian".
Being able to be alone for a vast period of time, being able
to choose not to talk or to be exact automatically unable to talk specially when asked out of the blue questions, keeping secrets (not perfect though), trying to understand
people or more so reading people while others misunderstand us, introverts.
These are the things portrayed in the korean drama series and at some point, I
could relate. Even the funny parts where the character thinks so much until
when he decides to speak, no one is there to listen. There were a lot, except
for some few things.
Things that I couldn't relate with the character is of
course, the guy is rich while I'm not (haha!). Money or finances are very hard
to earn in my setting and of course his status or position. But nevertheless
that is not really part of being an introvert. Other things that I differ from the character, is that he dances,
I don't! Even in secret. But I do sing! and again, honestly, I sing more songs
that are related to my Christian faith. Other songs? I tend to shy away from it
and not even the sense of delight in singing it. There are few though, but
really, little desire in singing other songs other than what is related to my
faith.
Wearing a hood?
nah! not really into it. But at times I do like wearing a hood. Not just
always. I wonder what else I can't relate with the character? I can't think of something
else now.. Some things that we are the same? Listening, we are fine in just
listening and folks who knows us should notice that. But to force us to talk or
ask us to tell a story? We really tend to have no ability to speak our minds as
fast as our mouth. We really tend to think much first and when we are ready to
talk, others most often change the topic. And, waiting for an introvert to talk requires much much patience.. hihihihi!
I read one article about introvert as well and talking
about "talking", the author says (paraphrase) "we don't really
talk much about small things or activities, but more about life. " And, I
think I would agree on that. And as the author also emphasized, we like to tend
to stick to the things which we see as valuable or important, from which we
like to put all our energy towards it.
Writing, I must say seem to be our means of an outlet
more than our mouth. Specially these times that computers are built. Because
reality wise, my writing is not that reaaaallly good. I mean, my hand writing. And,
I think having the ability to change or edit what you wrote makes this
"writing" more effective for us in expressing our thoughts and minds,
such as what I am doing now.
Well, I think I could share more of my thoughts of this,
but I think I'll end here. Just really glad to see a show featuring the
character of an introverted one which I hope sends at least ideas to others or
to the extroverts who try to want us to be like them. Because reality wise? Us
being an introvert makes us who we are, as unique person as should be. And hope
we are accepted as we are. Cheers!
